She called .... again.
She called early this morning to tell me that while Son #2 was at tutoring yesterday she noticed that he really isn't trying.
Yes. In. Deed.
Her: "He told me that he just didn't get it and it didn't matter anyway because he's going to military school in January. I told him that he shouldn't give up and he said that he had given up on the first day of school."
Me: "Yes."
Her: "Well, I just wanted to tell you about that and to say that it may be a confidence issue."
Me: "OK."
Her: "He seems to try very hard to be the opposite of his older brother, who he refers to as a "geek". I don't want to make assumptions here but it seems that he wants to be different."
Me: (does she think she's revealing something here that we never thought of?! I think she does!) "Yes, he's tried to be "different" from the other 5 for quite some time now. It's not confidence so much as the lack of desire. He's not incapable, he just chooses to not do the work. Every teacher he's had has said that he's very intelligent and capable -- and that's what's so frustrating."
Her: "Oh yes, he's very smart. He just needs to study."
Me: "I'm not sure what you want me to say. Other than making sure he goes to tutoring and forcing him to sit with an open book in his lap, there's nothing we can do to make him study. We could hold a gun to his head and we still can't promise he'll study. He has to WANT to do this. It has to come from HIM. We can't do ANYTHING more than we're doing."
---I have to add here that she got very, very quiet at the "gun" part. I almost said, "Oh give me a break -- it's just a word picture!" Besides, I don't have a gun..... hmmmmmm............
Her: "Yes, that's true. Well, I just wanted to let you know what I see."
Me: "Thank you very much."
I know she's just trying to do her job. I know that she's concerned about him. I know that she means well. But I don't understand what she wants me to do. I don't understand why she doesn't get it. I don't understand why I have to tell her over and over again that it has to come from HIM, that I can't make him succeed.
I think you should all be very proud of me. I did not say what I wanted to say (or rather, I did not shout what I wanted to shout): DO NOT CALL ME AGAIN......EVER!!
OK, well the fact that the husband is the president of the school board may have had something to do with my restraint.
2 comments:
The fact that you are writing your blog todays means you are still alive after the phone bill insident! YEA!!!! I am very proud of you that you didn't yell. I would have! How many times do you have to explain the same thing over and over and over againn?? Oh well, maybe that was the last one. It's good to see you go through all this crap so I can be prepared for it when the time comes! I know it is coming with your niece! Sheeesh!
I really think you need to tell her, should she call again, that you can only rehash something so many times before she will force you to be rude. And the limit has been met!! And I don't care if she is "trying to do her job". This is the woman teaching the youth in your area. Does she not have common sense?!? I don't think so. Therefore she needs a different profession. It's only my opinion.
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