The Silence is Deafening .....

...... and very, very difficult to live with.  In fact, the silence (in addition to my cats) makes me feel like I'm going insane.

     A little background:

     Once upon a time there was a young man and a young woman who met, fell in love, got married, and pretty promptly ..... got pregnant (OK, it was a year and a half, which is actually pretty promptly).

Though they were a bit surprised at the promptness, they were ready (ha!) and very, very excited.

     On November 27th, 1984 they fell in love again ..... with a tiny little girl.  

As this tiny little girl grew, she became less tiny ..... and more vocal.  She learned to talk a bit, but not too much, early.  And she loved to talk.  

Her parents never spoke "baby-talk" to her and so she learned to hold a decent conversation with most people .... and animals.

     When this little girl was 2 1/2 her loving parents fell in love yet again ..... this time with two tiny little girls.  These little girls fell in step with their older sister ..... and talked.  All three talked.  And talked.  And talked some more.

     Three years later the loving parents fell in love again .... but this time it was with a tiny little boy.  The parents wondered if there would be a difference in the amount of talking that would emit from this new and different creature.

It did not take them long to realize that the answer was, "no".  This little boy loved to talk even more than his sisters.  He would talk to anyone and anything.  He could hold a very interesting conversation with a wall.

     Two years later the loving parents were joyously surprised at the arrival of another little boy and instantly fell in love with him.

This little boy decided that screaming would be his mode of conversation for a while.  And then he learned that talking was a whole lot easier .... on everyone.  And so he joined into the constant conversations in his loving, and not-so-quiet, home.

     Two years later ....... another love entered into this home ..... a third little boy.

This little boy did not desire to talk .... for quite a while.  In fact, he remained so silent that his concerned pediatrician ordered hearing tests to be done while he was sedated and his brain waves could be monitored.

If she had just held out a bit longer ..... she would have known that this little boy could, indeed, talk (and she still kicks herself for that to this day!).  He just didn't need to.  Everyone seemed to do the talking for him .... and all he really had to do was point at something and his wish was granted.  

One day, he decided that it was time to voice his opinion. And he spoke .... an entire sentence. After the shock wore off of the rest of the family they soon grew accustomed to this delightful child's constant conversations.

     And so these lovely and talkative children continued to grow and talk.  And talk.  And talk.  

In the house.  In the car.  In the store.  In the bathroom.  Through a bathroom door.  Under a restroom stall.  In school.  In church.  Not always when they should, but always.

     The loving mother and father enjoyed the conversations of their children .... mostly, but there were days when the mother would stay in the shower a wee bit longer to enjoy the silence.

     This home was always full of talking.  Not too much really.  Not as much as most people would expect.  In fact, many people over the years commented on how surprisingly quiet this home was, considering that it held 8 people.  But it was just the right amount of talking for this family.

     Soon it was time for the oldest child (who talked a whole let less by now ... at least, at home) to go off to college.

But there was still quite a bit of talking.

     Two years later the next 2 daughters went off to college.  There was quite a drop in the amount of talking after that, but there was still a goodly amount.

     Two years after that the first daughter returned home for a year to work in an internship before going off to grad school.  And so there was a bit more talking.

     And then, one day ..... one horrible day ....... the loving father of this family left rather suddenly, never to return again.  (But don't worry ..... he may have left (not by choice) but his loving family knows exactly where he is and that they will be with him again one day.)

     On that day ..... that horrible day .....  the home became very, very quiet.  

It remained that way for some time, but the family slowly started talking again.  And then more.  And then more.

     And then ..... in one month's time, it was time for the oldest daughter to head off to grad school .... and time for the oldest son to head off to college .... and for the middle son to head off to a new school (ummm, also not by choice, but there ya go).

     And suddenly ..... the house was very, very quiet .... again.  

     In less than a year this home had gone from containing 6 talking people, to containing 2.  

The loving mother found that 2 people don't talk nearly as much as 6.  

     The youngest son continues to grow and become involved with school and church activities, as well as hang out with his friends, and .... much to the mother's chagrin, plays mindless video games with complete strangers.

     And now ...... this silence ..... something the young mother once longed for once in a while and cherished when she had it ........ feels the silence slowly closing in on her.

It seems to be growing .... like a living thing.  

And as it grows, it seems to be taking up more and more space ..... and more and more of the oxygen in the home.

It feels as if the mother is suffocating in the silence.

She sometimes .... actually most times ....  feels that the silence is driving her mad.

And, though it may sound strange ...... she finds the silence deafening.