I hate the 18th -- no matter the month, I guess.
I thought today would be relaxing and better. I'm so tired of being wrong.
It was a blue day, in spite of my wonderful friends and mom. It's good to have them around and I don't know what I'd do without them. V has been a huge life line for me. I've cried several times today at the thought of her leaving tomorrow. I know she'll be back in a couple of weeks.
The surgeon is still out so he hasn't seen the films. However, the radiologist's report came back normal. I will breathe a bit easier once the surgeon confirms that, hopefully on Monday.
I got a call from the university today (the Dean's office). They apologized and asked if I needed them to do anything else to make this right. I told them the apology was enough.
I did get a good call about our health insurance. Daughter #1's coverage was up Dec 31st and I was paying for COBRA. I was told today that since Jim died before that date her insurance would be paid for a year (like mine and the other 5). So that's one less thing I have to pay for (the monthly insurance payments, not the medical care).
Then I got an e-mail today that shocked and hurt me more than I can say --- I cannot believe someone would do this to me.
A man who used to work with Jim wrote me yesterday, asking if he could meet with me to discuss my financial future. I thought the company he worked for was an insurance company (whom Jim had a policy with). I sent him an e-mail telling him that I had decided to use a trust company, but thanked him for being there for me (I know him and his wife). He sent me an e-mail today telling me how disappointed he is with me and upset that I wouldn't consider using him. He gets paid by bringing in business and this job is difficult for his wife because his paycheck depends on business from people like me. Then he proceeded to list out several reasons why I should use him -- all because he was Jim's "mentor" and responsible for Jim being where he was and what he was (I'm certain Jim would dispute that). He didn't say, but indicated with every word --- I owe him.
I am still stunned. I could hardly talk through the pain and tears and nausea he caused (even as he wrote, "I hope I'm not causing you pain"). I thought he was a friend. Wrong --- again.
I wish God would cut me some slack.
10 comments:
Send me his name Sis...I SO want to kick his sorry arse! How DARE he???? The world is full of jerks like this, J...but remember that you are loved beyond measure and that you don't owe him ANYTHING.
Lemme' at him!
I love you....every minute of every day.
Lis
I'm pretty sure that if someone says,"I hope I'm not causing you pain," knows full well that they are causing you pain and they are intending to do so.
I pray that God will place a hedge of protection around you from those who would try to bring you pain or harm. I pray that anyone with anything but the best of intentions for you would be compelled to hold their tongues and words. I pray that you will have peace in the decisions that you are having to make.
I love you and I'm willing to join your sister's posse.
Janine, I'm sorry that someone you and Jim knew would try to manipulate you like that. What a sad concept of "friendship" he has.
I *am* happy to hear the positive news of W's scan and insurance coverage. I think of you all and pray for you daily.
Rebecca
I've been thinking about you all day especially since it is the 18th. I have to admit I'm feeling a little nauseous after reading the comments from this person that wants to "help" you with your financial planning. I am stunned that he claims any part of Jim's successes. Jim accomplished great things because God gave him some amazing gifts but because of your love, support and encouragment he was able to accomplished all God created him to be.
Love you!
DT
Janine - that man was a jerk - and obviously very "self-absorbed" to even consider approaching you at this time for his own benefit! How sad for him!
It's amazing the things that people can say and do - and hurt other so terribly much! I'm so sorry! I continue to pray for you!
My love, Malinn
Well, my first comment couldn’t be posted on your blog. But as I was stewing this morning about the jerk that had the nerve to cause my friend such pain, I finally realized – you have to let it go. First the university incident, now this guy; I suspect you will come across other jerks in the days ahead. But you can’t allow them to take up any of your precious energy or space in your heart. You need to focus on the good around you. Okay, so you might be saying, “What! Did she say ‘good’… is she kidding?” You have 6 awesome kids, a wonderful mom and siblings, all kinds of friends that love you in so many ways and tennis of course! I know you know that, and that’s what you have to hang on to. Write that guy’s name on a piece of paper and burn it in an ash tray.
“CYH”
Love you,
M
Hey sis, I don't like the 18th anymore either. It bites. Yesterday had to have been rough on you. I'm glad mom and V are there for you. As for Mr. this job is difficult for my wife becasue the paycheck depends on it. GET A NEW JOB AND STOP TRYING TO MAKE MY SISTER FEEL GUILTY!!!!!!!!! DANG! That just got my undies in a bunch! How dare he. Posse time again. We can let the first one go since the deans office called and I am sure had a talk with little miss and her manners. So shes off the hook. But for some man to try an make you feel quilty and saying all the @*&$ he did needs to be strung up by the closest tree and all of your freinds and family can pour fire ants all over him. Dad? Ya with me? I am just furious about this. What a loser! God, you and the kids made Jim the man he is no thanks to the jerk who needs to find a new job!
Thank God these people are few and far between and your friends snd family out way all of them combined, thats awsome. I love you sis. I hope the package I sent makes you smile maybe even kinda make ya laugh! Try and have a good day! Talk to you soon!
I'm so sorry you had to deal with this. There's nothing worse than someone you thought was a friend turning into someone who shows their true colors when you most need them. Most likely he is clueless to the pain he's causing and thinks he has the best intentions, but seems like he's just trying to get some new business. I hope and pray experiences like this will be minimized for you. You deserve not to have them! You're doing so well, even if you don't realize it. I'm so happy you have so many wonderful friends & family to surround and comfort you and help you. It's the true meaning of Christian community! God bless you :)
The nerve of that guy. I would be happy to join the posse. That was
very insensitive. A true friend would not go there. You know him
and his wife and what he does. If you would have needed his guidance
you would have asked for it. Hang
in there girl. So glad your mom is
there. I'm still thinking of you and praying for you everday. Hopefully I will get a chance to see you at church tomorrow. If not
I will bring food between 5-6:00.
Miss seeing you.
Love,
Gina
Janine,
You are not responsible for someone having a "difficult job". He was obviously venting about his stressful job, and was way out of line to take it out on you. I am willing to bet, your are not the only one who has witnessed his rantings!
I will pray for him AND his wife, along with you and your family.
XOXO
Thinking of you as always.
K in AK
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