Ask Me Wednesday

Happy Wednesday!

The first question I have to answer is from Leonard in icy Sweden .....  

What is Ask Me Wednesday?

Ask Me Wednesday is my weekly posting answering the questions that people ask -- about raising our kids, our life, opinions, etc.  They mostly ask questions about kids.  I guess that since I have 6 children people figure that I've already made plenty of mistakes that I can advise them to NOT make!

This next question is from CD.  She asked about raising teenage girls:

"did you find yourself taking their new hormonal changes personal?? And just how long does this distancing themself from Mom thing last?? Everyone says "they'll come back around", but it feels like forever right now. I have 2 teenage daughters. 13 and 14. My 13 yr old has completely turned into an alien that most of the time no-how, no-way resembles the sweet, loving, affectionate little girl I had for 12 yrs. She is completely wrapped up with her bestest friend, but to her family, we mostly get silence (except for when she's fighting with her sister) And because she tends to be lazy, it seems I'm always nagging her about something she didn't do. She is a cancer, born in July who I could totally relate to since I'm a moon-child myself. But I gotta tell ya, most times when she does actually speak, I find myself wondering, "who is this girl and what did she do with my daughter?!!!!"

You made me laugh, CD, with your descriptive questions!  

We used to say that our oldest child left her sense of humor outside the door of her middle school her first day there, and then forgot to pick it back up ... ever.

Actually, she's much better now .... over 10 years later.

Other than a bit of silence and a loss of a sense of humor, we didn't go through a lot of hormonal stuff with the girls.  I'm not sure why -- except that maybe our expectations were always the same and they knew that.  I have never used hormones as an excuse for acting differently and so they didn't hear that growing up.  I know that hormones do indeed affect mood and physical feelings but I don't think they should dictate our actions.  

It's funny, but I helped Jim to not take the girls "teenage stuff" personally, and he helped do the same with the boys.  The girls I got.  The boy were, and still sometimes are, totally alien to me.

The best advice that I can give is .... relax and try to stay about it all because .... this, too, shall pass.

And YAY for all "mean moms"!

Wendee asked me what are my favorite plays?

Wow, that question requires a lot of thinking and a lot of trying to remember.

I loved the plays of Neil Simon.   They are usually hysterically funny and yet very sad at the same time.  Kind of like life.

I have mixed emotions about Tennessee Williams ..... very, very morose plays but I like some of them --- like The Glass Menagerie.

I like Edward Albee's stuff ---- although he, too, can be very sad and a bit (OK, more than a bit) disturbing.

A asks:
Dear J,
My Wednesday question is about style. I have a fashion bug in my home (Miss G). She worries to excess about her clothes. At this time I have been indulging her because unhappiness with her clothes can actually be a distraction at school. Fashion seems to be a type of armor she wears so she can cope. And she is doing so much better this year. I just don't want her to value herself by how she looks. Do you think that as her confidence in school and social situations increases she may place less importance on having her hair just so and wearing what fashion dictates?

Hmmm, that's a tough one.  Does this mean that she wants you to shop certain places for the clothes?  If so, are they expensive?  If the answer is no (to the expensive part) then I would not have a problem with this, but only because it seems to be helping her feel better.  I do hope that as she gains confidence this need will not continue to grow with her.  I guess you should keep emphasizing her accomplishments and behavior over her looks and her clothes.  

And about the building dedication --- it's scheduled for Friday, December 19th at 3:00 and it's for everyone!!

OK, that's it for this week, unless I get more questions later tonight.

Right now I have to decide what we're doing for dinner tonight.  

And then we have to get everything ready for us to watch the Macy's Parade and then the Dog Show tomorrow.  Much preparation will be needed.  OK, not really.  But we may have to practice sitting on our butts and feeling really full.  

After all, this IS a serious holiday!!

Have a Happy Thanksgiving ..... and get ready to tell me more about what you're grateful for.

P.S.  MQ --- You can come over any time you want!!!  I've missed you!!!!