.... of the stockings are hung.
Seven out of eight of us are home.
Three out of seven of us went to see the movie "Black Swan" today.
Ummmmm ..... it was ...... a trip.
Something that I'm still thinking about.
But not really an "enjoyable" movie.
Not your standard Christmas fare, though it kind of fit me this week.
Six out of seven of us (plus C and his daughter C) went out to dinner tonight, while one out of the seven waited on our table.
He did a very, very good job.
I think he needs a raise.
:)
It's great to have the kids here.
Son #1 and Son #3 have been locked in some kind of soccer video game duel. I think Son #3 is kicking butt.
Today was a better day for me.
If you measure it by the amount of tears shed.
I don't think I cried at all today.
A nice change from every other day.
I seem to be feeling Jim's absence more this year .... if that's even possible.
Fine one minute.
Down the next.
Having fun much of the time.
Going through the motions some times.
I don't enjoy feeling like this .... especially since the past several months have been so much better, for the most part.
I expect that this, too, will pass.
Along with the year 2010.
Another year down.
Another year survived.
Another year lived.
And mostly .... enjoyed.
I am blessed.
In so many ways.
And thankful.
And grateful .... for Jim; for my children; for my family; for my friends.
But mostly for ..... the Reason for the Season.
Happy Wednesday/Thursday, Peeps.
:)
3 comments:
J - you've lost the love of your life. It's Christmas. You are bound to be going through a myriad of emotions, and you have every right to do so.
BTW, I read your blog on Widow's Voice and just thought, "oh my ...- how can someone say that to her?" Dreadful. Awful. No empathy! As you said, at least we all understand each other.
I'm glad your children are home for Christmas, and I know that you will all try hard to make it as happy as possible. But, it's going to be hard because there is one stocking not hung up, one empty chair, and I know that you are all going to feel that, you most of all.
If I don't get a chance to speak again until after the holidays, I hope you find some peace and light. You already have the love xxx
janine, so sorry for the stocking that's not being hung by the chimney with care. i love you, and will be praying for you all through the holiday.
love to hear your heart. you are such a treasure to your family! what a gift Jim was to your family. the father of your children. the leader of your home. his presence goes on through you and the lives of your children, and his memory will continue to influence your kids. so thankful that you all have good, positive memories to hang on to… while i know you'd much rather have him in the flesh… i'm just so very thankful that you have rich reminders of what a good, good man he was.
blessings to you and your family as you continue to journey through grieving. may God richly bless you with His continued presence and guidance through 2011.
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