I've tried to keep quiet about this, but I'm finding that it's a bit difficult to keep things quiet on the web.
I have started a private blog. Private, in that it's by invitation only. Private, in that I can write every single thing I think &/or feel about being widowed and not worry about who's reading it. Private, in that it's for widowed/grieving people and not for friends and family. And especially not for people who enjoy mis-using someone's words against them.
It's also private, in that the readers can write comments about their thoughts and feelings and not worry about who's reading them. It's probably more of an on line support group than a blog.
So, if you are a widowed/grieving person and would like to be a part of this honest communication, email me at jeggerstx@gmail.com
Even those who've left their email address here. I'm on vacation this week and don't have my usual easy access to the Internet so I can't spend the extra time it'll take to copy and paste your info from here.
Thanks to all of you who've expressed an interest in reading it.
And to my family and friends, I know most of you understand the need for a separation between my honesty .... and your worry. Thank you to all of you who've stuck by me, through thick and thin. Not everyone has been able to do that, which unfortunately is very common among those who are widowed. But, it's also a fortunate thing because you get to see people for who they really are. And you learn who to keep in your life ..... and who you can't waste any more energy on.
When Jim died his brother told me something that has proven to be very, very true: "This kind of tragedy will bring out the best in some people .... and the worst in others."
And it has. In some cases I've seen the best of a person .... and then later the worst in him/her.
And I've learned that life is too short to keep dealing with "the worst". I'm done with unhealthy relationships. And that feels great. :)
Speaking of unhealthy, it is now after 11:30 pm in Oregon. Which means that my Texas-timed body thinks it's after 1:30 am.
So I'm going to bed. And hopefully ... to sleep.
Later, Peeps.
When I remember another story.
:)
11 comments:
Wait you're in Oregon? Where? I'm in Astoria right now!
So glad you are doing this. I'm sure there is a big need. More power to ya!
Glad to hear of your private blog. I hope it is a very long time before I would find the need to request an invite. I was talking to my cousins wife on the 4th of July. My cousin died of brain cancer a couple of years ago. She is part of a special blog/site for those who lost a loved one of that particular type of cancer. She mentioned once she made a comment on Facebook thinking she was in one of this private group . . . She said her comment would make no sense to others outside of her group. Moni B.
Will you still blog on One Breath at a Time??
Wendee .... Eugene.
Leslie ... Thank you, my friend. :)
Moni ... I know how she feels.
Anon .... Yes, I'll keep writing here. :)
Well, I totally get and support your need for your private peeps portal. Selfishly, I'll miss your insight and sharing about grief as it helps me with my non-spouse loss. But, I do understand. *buries head in bag of Cheetos*
I'm so glad you've created a 'safe place' for you and those in need. You have such a gift Janine, and can provide insight and comfort to so many. Please don't stop doing that for all of us here at One Breath At A Time. I would truly miss you!
xoxox
So glad you will still be here.
Hope you're enjoying Oregon! I'm a little north of where you are (Portland area), but I spent a fabulous 4 years in Eugene (GO DUCKS!!). It's a great city. You have to go get breakfast at Studio One Cafe (19th-ish and Agate), their french toast is ah-mazing. And I salivate thinking about the tomato cheese soup at the Glenwood (near campus). As a poor college kid, these were delicacies!! :)
Anyway - I'm glad you've started a place to blog free from worry. I'm a lurker who also hopes not to get an invitation any time soon, but have enjoyed reading your blog - your honesty and love for your family has touched me. I'm sorry that you've had people who you feel have judged you or made you feel as though you couldn't be as honest as you should be able to be in this space.
I'm glad you'll still be blogging here.
please allow me access my friend x
So glad to hear that we will still be able to read your writings here. I am really enjoying reading about your "early" days.
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