Silence Speaks Volumes ....

       (this was from a very good day in Sept 2007.  Jim is driving, J, L & S were visiting)

 .... at least from me.

And to me, though the volumes it speaks are varied and many .... depending on the type of silence, I suppose.

But here -- on my blog -- silence from me means that the emotions are too close to the surface to write.

And sometimes .... it also means that I am so overwhelmed that .... There. Are. No. Words.

(which I'm just going to start writing as T.A.N.W. ---- so that will be a sort of secret between me and you .....).  There may be days when all I post is a picture ..... and I'll title it, T.A.N.W.

Or maybe there won't be a picture at all.

And you'll "get it".

 But today is not that day.

Son #3 surprised me at the front door on Saturday evening (VD) with these:

         His father did a very, very good job.  

   I had a friend who left me a card, and another who left me some beautiful potted tulips.

(I wonder how long they will survive in my care?  Any bets?)

I had some very loving friends come and share dinner and wine with me and Son #3.

I am blessed.

     So someone who works in scheduling at the hospital must also not like VD, because that person decided to switch up my schedule, yet again, on VD.  They must've been in a tiff because they had to work on VD, got no chocolate on VD, or just wanted to see  who's life they could just give a little a dig into the ribs.

Guess I won the lottery that day.

As of now, at this very moment in time, knowing that the "powers that be" at MDA may, at any nano-second, switch it all up again ..... here is the plan:

I don't have to be down there until Wednesday, at 7:15 a.m.  And then I will spend a good part of that day having all kinds of fun tests done, appointments with various doctors, and probably just waiting around.

I don't know what time the surgery will be on Thursday .... I don't know anything (zero, zilch, nada, nothing-at-all) about the surgery (the time, how it will be done, where they are going in, how I will be affected afterward ..... and, the most important thing of all ..... how long will it be until I can play tennis afterwards?).  I won't get any of this information until the day before the surgery.  

Go figure.

Here's what I've learned from my experience with this hospital so far:  they do not enjoy giving the "personal touch" (i.e. talking by phone; only by e-mail, in response to 5 of mine, or ... if I sound on the verge of slitting my wrists in a phone message .... they may call.  But never to give me info.  Never.)

My plan, today, is to stay at a hotel near the hospital that night, rather than driving all the way back home (an hour), not sleeping, and getting up early the next day to drive back in for the surgery.

I am told to expect to stay one to two nights.

I'm totally voting for one.

     Last night I was hit by another attack of insomnia, which was very, very frustrating because I thought I had whipped that.

I suppose I thought wrong ..... since I didn't fall asleep until around 3:30 a.m.

Sigh.

    This morning I played tennis .... wasn't looking forward to it on 4 hours of sleep, but I'm so glad that I went.  Somedays I wish I could play every single day.  It makes everything seem just a bit better.

     I then went into work for a bit, ran a couple of errands and am now home with Son #3, Mom, D, Gabby, Sassy and the two felines.

I am waiting to take Mom and Sassy to my vet for her first checkup this afternoon (Sassy's, not Mom's --- and don't even try to act like some of you weren't going there!).  

     Tonight I have Grief Share.

All prayers, as always, will be appreciated from 7 pm till 9 pm.

OK, that's it.  An weekend full of emotion.

Hopefully, a week full of less.

Thank you for hanging in there with, and for, me.

I. Am. Blessed.

UPDATE:

Just returned from a fun-filled time at the vet!  Gabby weighs 114 lbs and can totally whoop my butt on a leash.  She can now drag me anywhere she pleases .... and she did.  

It. Was. Humiliating.  

And a wee bit hilarious .... for everyone watching.

Eight months old ...... 

I think, that at around 10 months, I will invest in a saddle.

Sassy was great .... weighs 24 pounds at 8 weeks.

Don't tell my mom this ..... but she is TOTALLY going to weigh more, and be bigger than, Gabby.

Totally.

And I will be the one thinking that's hilarious!!