Happy Wednesday, my Peeps.

So it is now 11:48 p.m. so I need to hurry up and post this before it turns into "Ask Me Thursday".

It was a busy day .... and not the best of days.

It started out great .... played a great morning of tennis, went to work, got exhausted, came home to try to take a nap before a meeting tonight, couldn't go to sleep, got frustrated, then got sad, then got knocked over by a wave of grief.

I've been going and going and going and haven't really stopped to think about next week and all that will be happening ----- Daughter #2's graduation .... without Jim, quickly followed by a trip to Russia .... without Jim.  I'm overwhelmed by the thought of this trip .... traveling alone and then having a lot of time alone because Daughter #1 will still be busy with classes while I'm there.

I'm sure it will be great to go ..... I just wish Jim were here to go with me.  

He should be here.

But he's not.

I wonder if I'll ever get used to that?

Anyway, the day is almost over and so on with the questions .....

Wendie:
Nutritionally speaking, are you eating well?

I'd love to know what made you ask that question, Wendie?

And I'd love to tell you that, yes, I'm a great eater and that I always make sure to eat well.

But that would be a lie.

No, I do not eat well, nutritionally speaking.  I rarely think about eating ..... or seem to have the time to think ahead and plan a meal.

Eating has fallen way down on my list of priorities over the last 16 months.  It is not one of my favorite past times ..... unless I am with friends and am relaxed.  

Other than that, I eat so that I have fuel, but I rarely put much thought into it.

Yes, I know I need to work on that ... and I hope that I do .... as time goes on.

Especially for Son #3 ..... and Son #2 when he comes home.



Marilyn:
Ask Me Wednesday: You dared us to ask anything. (You may totally delete this question, and more than likely tell me it is none of my business.) But I have a curiosity to know what Jim's last words to you were before he went in to surgery. I can't even imagine how one would prepare for such a conversation, with all the what ifs. But reading about what an incredible man he was, I was curious about his final words to you and if you still replay them on a daily basis.

Marilyn,

I would love to tell you that our last words to each other were earth-shattering and conveyed all that we felt ...... but you see, we had no idea that we would not see each other again.

No.  Idea.  At.  All.

I was led to believe that he would most likely survive the surgery .... and I never doubted for a minute that he would not.

And so ...... our last words to each other were this ....... he said them and I echoed them back:

"I love you ....... and I'll see you later."

I wish I we had known ..... or had an inkling ..... I would have said so much more.  But I guess, in reality .... you can never say all that you want to say.  And so I rest secure in the knowledge that he knew how very much he was loved ...... by me and by our children.  And I know how very much he loved me.

So.  Very.  Much.

And thanks for asking.

: )


Tamara:
I would like to know what your favorite family vacation has been. Location, dates, any details you want to share would be appreciated. I love all the pictures of you and Jim from around the globe and wondered if there was a fave.

Tamara,

That is such a difficult question.

Our favorite type of vacation was a cruise.  It was the most relaxing vacation for us, but mostly for Jim, who couldn't work on a cruise vacation.

Every other vacation we took he always found a way to take a call, receive and send faxes, or whatever else needed his attention.  It didn't matter if it was Disney World or Europe.

I think that every vacation that we took was a favorite in it's own way.

Our first "family vacation" was to Oregon when Daughter #1 was only 6 months old.

She proved to be a fabulous traveler and we drove all over the place (flew there and then rented a car).  It was beautiful and she was very happy spending a lot of time in the car.  

My uncle flew us over Crater Lake in his 4 seater plane (where I was the first person ever to hurl in his plane ..... into a baggie, thank you very much).  That was the only glitch.

The next time we went to Oregon was also one of my favorite trips and it was when Son #2 was one ..... in fact we celebrated his birthday while we were there.  We went for my grandparents' 50th anniversary and we drove up and down the coast of Oregon and northern California.  The kids were wonderful and it was a beautiful and awesome trip.

We went to Scotland and England when Son #3 was around 3.  That was a great trip, too.  We visited my brother and his family in England and some friends in Scotland.  Took a sleeper train on that trip, which was fun.

Looked for the Loch Ness monster .... to no avail.

Loved Edinburgh, and Glasgow, as well as London.  It was Jim and my second trip to London, but first time with the kids.

We took 3 cruises with the kids, two trips to Disney World, beaches in Florida, New York City, San Diego, Washington D.C. and then I think the last all-family vacation was to Rome for Christmas of 2005 (although we may have done a cruise in 2006, though I can't remember at the moment).  Rome, Venice, Florence and ....... another place that I can't recall at the moment.

It was great.

Our very last vacation, which included only the 3 boys, was to Alaska in June 2007.  We visited my brother and his family again and it was a wonderful trip.

I don't think we ever had a bad vacation.  It's not that they always went smoothly .... they did not.  You can't always keep 6 kids happy at the same time, but overall ..... they were great.

And I treasure the memories.

Maybe some day I will have to do several posts that go into great detail on each vacation.  We'll have to see if my memory banks will cooperate.

Nat:
I love Tamara's question! A reminder of mine from last week that got lost-how is Jim's brother's recovery going? Praying and concerned for him.

Nat,

Thanks for asking.  J2 is having surgery tomorrow on his broken collar bone.  It seems that it has not healed as they had hoped.

Other than that he's doing as well as can be expected for someone with 7 broken ribs, as well as the collar bone.

The punctured lung healed so that was good.

Hopefully the surgery will go well and he will begin to heal quicker.

OK .... it is now past midnight, but since I started the post earlier, it will technically post on Wednesday.

Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day, with no waves.

Although I can't complain too much .... I haven't had a wave in a while ... and it only lasted for a few hours this afternoon ..... so that's still an improvement.

I miss him.

I wish he were here.

I wish I could turn so many things back over to him.

I wish he were here for the kids and for their big events.

But he is not.

And so I try to keep moving forward, in spite of getting knocked down by unexpected waves.

One step .... one breath .... at a time.