A blog that started out as a humorous tale of raising 6 children, then quickly became a chronicle of my grief at being suddenly widowed. Now it's the rest of my journey ... of living, laughing, crying, praying, rejoicing. Of being happy, sad, angry, content, sorrowful, alone, amazed and very, very blessed. And still taking life, one breath at a time ........
Saturday, February 23, 2008
A Poll
OK, I have a question that requires an honest answer. For those of you too chicken to be honest in public, feel free to sign as "anonymous". This will keep you busy while I'm at college.
Yesterday the lady who does my nails told me that I should color my hair. "Your hair does not match your face. Your face is young." After being speechless for a moment ---
Me: "Several people have told me that they like my hair color and that it's pretty."
Her: "They lied."
So there you go. I'm taking a poll. Ask your husbands/wives but give an honest answer. For those of you who haven't seen me in a few years you get to sit back and enjoy the poll.
Here's the question: (and I'm going to avoid the most obvious one --- have you lied to me about liking my hair?!): How many of you think the grey makes me look old and I should color it?
At the moment the thought of coloring it exhausts me because I'd have to do something every 2 weeks. Please, I can barely remember to feed the kitten. The kids are totally on their own.
OK, time to 'Barack the Vote' (and please don't post any comments or e-mails asking if that's my political endorsement!).
Discuss.
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27 comments:
I am with you Janine on keeping up with it. You need to do what is going to be easiest for you. After I lost my hair and it has come back, I have received some similar reactions...are you going to go back to blond? When I think of the amount of money I spend over a 10 year period on hair color, it makes me sick to my stomach. I wasn't even gray yet! If you color it again, it should be because you want to. I like it the way you have it.
-Amy
I agree with Amy. It is alot of your time and money to start coloring it. Then you have to pick a color you like. If that doesn't look right you have to wait a while so you don't fry your hair dying to much. Then the next color might not be right either. So, then you hightlight (something else to grow out or keep up with).
I have to agree with your hairdresser about one thing, YOU DO HAVE A YOUNG FACE AND BODY (I threw that in because I'm sure she was thinking that too). Your hair is thick (which I love) and so cute. My vote is leave it like it is. I like the way you look.
I have always told you the truth, I love your hair the way it is. the spikier the better, too. lori
I think it looks good on you but I think it does make you look older than you are. I say its your choice (but I would vote for color)
We have never met, but I worked at KPMG with Jim. Someone forwarded your blog to me and I have just started to read it. My thought on hair...do what you want. I like something that is easy, but I also have to like it. Do what works best for you... Of course that could change over time and then you just do something different.
You are in my prayers...
Okay, you asked! It's all relative. I have always said and maintain that I like your gray "highlights" It looks natural, (and DO NOT read that as old), your face is young, you always get a young hair style, and you dress well. You can pull it off with grace and style. It says I'm comfortable and confident with who I am - which is the Janine I know. If you were wearing sweats and a baseball cap all the time I might tell you something else. Yeah if you got it colored you might look a year or two younger. But how young do you want to look? And at what cost? You could shave off another few years with a face lift (again, don't read anything into that - you don't need one), and then you could get a breast augmentation and look like you're 20 something. But then you wouldn't have any friends left because you would be too young looking to hang around with.
Ultimately, you need to do what makes you feel good. But since you asked for opinions, if you do decide to color it, I will say I didn't like the red hightlights so much.
Love you,
M
Good morning my darling daughter. Well, you know what my opinion is, but I'll give it none-the-less. Natural and spikey. Looks GREAT on you. Toooooooo cute!!
And tell the girl that does your nails to buzz off! Have fun at college and give everyone a hug from me. I love you all bunches.
OK, here's my two cents! I've learned to do whatever makes me feel great! If you feel great with grey hair, then let it be! It does make you look a few years older, but I agree with other comments that you as a person who looks far younger than your years! I still consider you a cute young thang! Love, Cindy (and I'm sure Ben too! - with his grey, or shall we say white, he doesn't get the hairdye thing!).
Ah, the ultimate test of friendship and loyalty--can it withstand an honest discussion of hair color? I feel like I'm stalking the site today to see who will respond how, and will they sign their name. As for me, I like the "salt and pepper look", especially with the spikey style--there's nothing old about that style, no matter the color. do what makes you feel good, but I vote for the natural look. susan
I never thought about it until you asked but I think that you are a very beautiful woman, because you have a sort of light in your eyes that radiates from within. I have never thought of whether your graying hair makes you look older. I do think it looks good on you, and I don’t think you look “old” in any way! I think you’d look fine with dyed hair but I also believe that God made us the way He made us, and we are meant to grow older gracefully not by fighting it every step of the way (even though it’s hard in this culture we live in). I think people look young(er) no matter what age if they eat healthy and take care of themselves physically and feel loved, and beauty is not defined (or shouldn’t be) by traditional measures but by measures of the heart. I totally struggle with the traditional view of beauty and how ugly I always felt when I was younger (I was a huge geek with buck teeth and freckles when I was younger and I thought I was hideous!!! As a teen, I wore so much makeup that I literally could not go outside without 30 min in the hair and makeup-dept –but I have come to feel that natural is better) I feel weird bringing him up because I never knew him, only through seeing him at church and now getting to know him through your blog, and so I hope I don't say anything "wrong" here but Jim obviously loved you so very much just as you are! But I think hair dying is a personal decision –easy sounds good at least for now! (I do dye my hair lighter b/c dishwater blonde does not look good one me… so I’m not all natural! But sometimes I want to dye it dark brown! lol) I hope that you don’t let that woman’s words make you feel bad because you are SO loved, and truly beautiful inside and out.
Hugs, Wendee
To color or not to color? I personally would not color. This is definately a personal choice. Take a picture of yourself and decide for yourself. . . .Moni B
ok here's another opinion, I think you look great just like you are, a beautiful mature woman who looks younger than her age. Your age (same as mine) is just fine. It is a good age to be. Now, that being said, if you ever want or need to look 25 years old for any reason, for instance a role in a play or something, then all you have to do is color the grey hair and you are done. That's because of the aforementioned young face and body.
So my answer is, the grey makes you look older than you would look without it (so, big deal) and you should only color it if you want to look younger than the rest of us. I hope you are having fun at college,
Love, Ruth
I like to be a little adventurous--especially when it is like painting a wall--it isn't permanent. Give it a try--and see if you like it--it might be worth the time--and I have made some great relationships with people by having that time. You never know who God puts in your life and where...Sometimes a new look can make a world of difference--
Marlene
Hmmm...well I'm in the group who really can't comment on your hair because I haven't seen you in so long, but *I* have a "thing" about my gray. It freaks me out (vain, I know.)and I have nightmares about being old and infirm;) SO, I colors mah hairs. In fact, My hubby is going out with the boys tonight and I'm planning a night of pampering and coloring. The thing is, I have SO much red in my hair, (blame my dad) that no matter how dark I color it, it always ends up red. As soon as the color starts to fade, it's red again. But red is better than gray for me...so I'll take it! I only color it about once every 3 months though.
Bottom line is, if you are comfortable with the gray that you have, just keep it:) You're beautiful and your nail lady needs to keep her unsolicited opinion to herself! Now if she wants to tell you that you're too danged SKINNY...then I'm okay with that!
I love you!!!!
Lis
Hmmm...well I'm in the group who really can't comment on your hair because I haven't seen you in so long, but *I* have a "thing" about my gray. It freaks me out (vain, I know.)and I have nightmares about being old and infirm;) SO, I colors mah hairs. In fact, My hubby is going out with the boys tonight and I'm planning a night of pampering and coloring. The thing is, I have SO much red in my hair, (blame my dad) that no matter how dark I color it, it always ends up red. As soon as the color starts to fade, it's red again. But red is better than gray for me...so I'll take it! I only color it about once every 3 months though.
Bottom line is, if you are comfortable with the gray that you have, just keep it:) You're beautiful and your nail lady needs to keep her unsolicited opinion to herself! Now if she wants to tell you that you're too danged SKINNY...then I'm okay with that!
I love you!!!!
Lis
Janine,
You have the color right - just the wrong placement. To be really with it you now have to have all the white together outlining the hairline with the black covering it. And not just Black, but pitch black. Very Natural Look. Just check out the gal on American Idol. Len says he is just jealous of anyone that still has hair.
Hope your day was filled with smiles.
LaNeta
Ok...for some reason, everyone seems to consider GRAY hair as old. I wouldn't mind going gray...IF IT LOOKED LIKE YOURS! I ask M all the time if you get that done or if is natural! No lie!
I agree, I hate going to get my nails done and/or my hair! I would love a short haircut, but my hair grows so fast, that it would be an every 2 week ordeal...no thanks.
Does gray look old? Probably yes. On anyone. BUT...you should do what YOU want to do. Keep your hair the way YOU like it on yourself. This is what your brother tells me..."If someone doesn't like your hair, I bet they will still live." OR he says, "Do whatever you want...just don't "B____" about it afterwards!"
Hope it helps...and hope you do whatever YOU choose! I like the color AND the spikes...very cute and spunky! (I like it on mom too and I always give her an extra 10+ years on her age! She looks fab!)
;)
XOXO
K in AK
If women as a group would tell the beauty industry to go jump in the lake we would live much happier lives. We'd also more time to do what really mattered. However, this is coming from somebody who wears make up may be 3 times a week and goes six months between hair cuts. The last time I saw you was at the Christmas Tea. You looked wonderful. I say leave it alone.
Lisa B.
Well, I haven't seen you in 10 years, so can't comment on your look per se, however, I started coloring a few years ago and immediately felt better about myself - less washed out (in my case). Now I can change the color with the seasons and do. It is a fun thing for me and the woman who does it pampers me, which I also need. Such a personal choice, though!
I agree with "whatever makes you feel best", but I like your hair the way it is. It's a cute style and it becomes you. You stand out.
I saw the author of a book called GOING GRAY: WHAT I LEARNED ABOUT BEAUTY, SEX, WORK, MOTHERHOOD, AUTHENTICITY, AND EVERYTHING ELSE THAT REALLY MATTERS on a talk show. One of the things the book chronicles is the author's many hair colors over the years. She finally decided to go gray when she saw a picture of herself and realized that the dark hair color she had was too harsh and actually made her look older. Her name is Anne Kreamer. The book got good reviews on Amazon.
Speaking of dark hair, T was looking at a picture of Mom a couple weeks ago and asked me why she colors her hair. Hello? He's met her! I told him she didn't - he couldn't believe it. It ain't easy being a woman. I bet nobody would suggest to George that he cover or uncover the gray. But then he IS George. If you ever do get the opportunity to watch him drink a beverage of any sort, read a newspaper or drive a car - take me with. Throw in a diaper change and I will swoon.
Love you,
Ann
I say you pull a Sinéad O'Connor and you won't have to worry about it, now will you?
I'm just trying to help you!! WHAT?????? It could work...your justification could be mourning. I wonder how many people would tell you it looks good??
And am I a leper??? None of you want to visit MY blog huh?? I see how it is, I spend all of my time, first of all, PROTECTING you all from communism and terrorism AND I spend my time (as does the wife)doing my blog. I guess I'm just not as entertaining as my sis. Oh well, I guess I'll just have to live with it.
All my love!
Little Bro
I'm not sure you need anymore comments because I love all that I have read. There's a verse in the Bible about grey hair being the crown of wisdom so in your case-we all know how wise you are! I love your hair and the color. I have alot of grey but choose to color about every 6-8weeks. But I honestly feel that you look younger than me even though we are the same age and that is why I color mine. Plus Jo at CTK told me it made me look a lot older! Love her honesty. Your skin on your face is close to flawless and your body is great. I don't think the grey make you look older but I wouldn't like your hair longer and grey. Hope your SING weekend was uplifting and joyful!
I am the hair police, and althought I have never met you, I can tell you that the recomendation from your nail tech was very rude. Some gray hair is better of NOT colored, it gets too ashy. As long as you are rockin' a cut that goes with your features-don't worry about your color!
www.ImakehairROCK4u2.com
All I can say is this entry I think may have received the most comments of any of your entries! Funny uh? Who knew hair color could be such a hot topic. Personally I love when my hair is colored it makes me feel less frumpy and since I also am your age and have a 7 yr. old and 8 1/2 yr. old I feel the pressure to color. I agree with everyone else I'm sure you look adorable just the way you are but I haven't seen you in 25 years. So I'll tell you in April my honest opinion! So until then do what makes you happy! It might be fun to color just for a change not because of some "nail chick". Looking forward to the reunion.
Love,
Julie
Well, my vote counts double because I'm your daughter. So I think that you are hot no matter what. Keep the gray, ditch the spikes. I mean...I'm not entirely sure what people meant by spikey, but what I'm imagining...no. I like it just how it is. :)
This comes from a chick who has been every color. Every single one. All of them were intended to hide the gray that has been coming in full force since I was 17. Lately I have been highlighting blonde to make it all blendand I'm ready to give it all up. I think you should keep it natural. I don't know who it was that decided that something other than natural is best, but I'd like to find them and shave their head. I think you are beautiful. You are young, your have beautiful eyes (that are starting to shine again) and you have a body that is tiny yet strong. Embrace the beauty that God has given you.
Coming from someone who is gray....I really like my gray hair. Not everyone can have it and you can't get it from a bottle. Keep it! It looks great on you (us).Katherine
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