A building made me cry.

 ..... and here it is:

     I was just at this building 2 weeks ago for early voting.  His name was not there.  Then, this past Sunday, Nat came up to me and asked my when they put his name up.  I have no idea.  I wish I had known, but I didn't.

So I went by today, to vote early in another election (all citizens of our school district, PLEASE go vote and PLEASE vote YES!) and to take pictures.

And then I cried.

Because as special as this is ..... I much rather it not be there and him be here.

But ..........

    

     Anyway, I wanted to share a book with all of you that I read and thought was great.  It's a novel and takes a look at God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit in a whole new way.  Whole.  New.  Way.

Some people have not liked it because of that.  But for me .... it was like reading my life now.  All of the things that are going on between God and me.  So I loved it.

It's call "The Shack" and you can read more about it here

The relationships with all 3 is like what my relationship with them are like now.  

Which is good.  

I never thought of myself as a legalistic Christian, but I guess I was .... at least when it came to dealing with my expectations of myself .... not so much for others.

But since Jim has died that's changed.  I feel closer to God than ever before.  I don't feel that I need to do anything to get closer.  We're close.  And there's nothing I can do to change that.  He loves me deeper and stronger than can possibly be explained.  And I don't have to have a specific-looking "quiet time" every day, or do certain things, or try harder to be "Christian".  He's with me all of the time and I know it.  I have time with Him all day long.  I don't have to sit down at 6:00 in the morning with my Bible and a devotion book to be with Him.  Is it good for me to spend time doing that?  Yes, definitely.  But He doesn't expect it.  He only expects me to love.

And that is so freeing.

But here's the sinful human part  ---- I would give that closeness up, too, to have him back.

I'd give up everything in my life to have him back.

But that's a game that can't be played so .........

God and I are good.

Speaking of God and doing good (OK, I didn't actually mention "doing", but I am now), I've told you that Daughters #2 and #3 are going to Kenya at the end of December.  Well they and some of the others going have put together a Christmas CD to raise money.  I will give you the website where you can download it .... at no charge, but it would also be great of you to send in a donation if you do download it.  You can find it here.  And it's got to be great because my lovely daughters are singing on it, as well as playing the violin and harp.  And while you're on that page please be sure to check out the video of the children singing.  You'll love it.

Yes, I'm a bit biased, but not that much.  I'm just stating a fact.

UPDATE:  I just listened to my download (and yes I donated!).  Daughter #3 plays "O Holy Night" beautifully on the harp.  Daughter #2 and her roommate M, sing "Silent Night" and it's GREAT!!  (Daughter #2 starts the song and I think may be playing her mandolin).  Check it out ... it's a worth cause!

And now I will be so bold as to ask for your prayers, yet again.  But this time they are not for me.  

My other friend V's first grandchild was born yesterday, a month early, because they saw some complications with the baby, a boy.  They thought they could wait to do a surgery until next week but he started crashing this afternoon.  They rushed him into surgery right before I started this post.  

I just received a phone call from a friend who told me that he did not make it.

Please pray for comfort, strength and peace for this family ---  for my friend and her husband, for their wonderful son and daughter-in-law who are facing the unimaginable, and for the surrounding family.  

Sorry for the down post.  It's just been one of those days (see building pictures).  I would try to hide that from you and entertain you, but then it wouldn't be real would it?

It wouldn't be my life.

Thanks for riding along with me.