One Less Thing ....

.... to worry about .... even when I think I'm not worrying.

First, G's surgery went well.  Very well.  Last I heard they planned to discharge him later today and let him (and V) sleep in the hotel .... where they would get much more rest than in a hospital room.
Thanks for the prayers.
:)

Second, today has been a long day.
Not necessarily a bad one .... just very long.
The dams that have been holding back the tears and the emotions behind my eyes and heart are crumbling quickly.
I've been maintaining control for too long.
Far too long.

Things went well today for my child.
Very, very well.
He didn't have to see the judge.
His attorneys spoke to the DA while we sat in the court room .... two of many people sitting .... waiting.
The DA was impressed with this child's school record and how highly thought of he is .... by teachers and administrators.  And by the fact that he is basically .... a really good kid.

And so he decided to go with deferred adjudication.
For 6 months.
No fines.
No community service.
Nothing.
See a probation officer and stay out of trouble for 6 months and this will all go away.
Make one little mistake, one small bad decision ..... and it will not go away.  Instead, it will be far worse than it could've been today.
He's smart.
I think, and pray, that he'll make pretty decent decisions now.

I'm surprised that my knees didn't buckle when they told us the news.
It was all I could do to stare very hard at the paper the DA had given them ..... very hard, so that the tears wouldn't start.
The feeling of relief really needed to be expressed with tears.  Lots and lots of tears.
But I didn't have the luxury .... or the time.
So they remained firmly locked away.
Where they still are.

I really needed to let them out tonight.
And I really needed a pair of strong arms to hold me while I cried.
But I had neither the time, nor the arms .... so they stayed stuffed inside.
And I went off to lead my high school Bible study group ..... hoping that I'd be able to maintain.
And I did.

But the great thing is that I didn't have to maintain.
I was able to spend 2 1/2 hours with a great group of kids .... and not think about my crumbling dams once I'd been there for 30 minutes or so.
And that was very, very nice.

It was great to have a break, but I'm not stupid.
The dams are still crumbling.
The tears are still there.
And they need to come out.
I just need to find some time in my calendar to tend to them.
Sooner, rather than later.
Before the dams burst wide open at a most inappropriate time.

I'm not sure when that will be.
Maybe when I find a pair of strong arms.

Strong arms and a whole lot of Kleenex.

Happy Thursday, Peeps.
Let me know if you find an extra pair of strong arms.
I'll bring the Kleenex.
:)