"I'm Gonna Kick His Ask" ....

.... and for those of you who have no idea where that comes from, I have included one of my favorite YouTube videos.
You're welcome.



Now that you have watched the above video, you understand where that line came from.

You do not, however, understand why I am using it.
Yet.

That's the line that's been running through my head for most of the month of September.
Well, except that you'd have to take out the k and add another s.
But other than that, it's the identical line.

And who's ask, you might be pondering, am I going to kick?
C'mon.
Really?
Three guesses and the first two don't count.

Never mind.
Some of you are just very bad guessers.

Jim.
Jim's ask is going to be kicked from one end of Heaven to the other.
Yes, I realize that there's no sadness in Heaven.
Not a problem.
I won't be sad.
And Jim won't either.
Just maybe a tad bit scared.
As he should be.

He's a very smart man.
Always has been.
Smart, that is.
He hasn't always been a man.
I mean, many people (including moi) have said that he was born 40, but that's really just a figure of speech.
He was really born as a baby.
No.  Really.
I've seen pictures.

So, now that we've cleared that up .... smart.
Very smart.
And a lot of common sense.
So there's no way in hell, oops .... I mean, Heaven, that he's not up there, knowing what has got to be going on down here:  the longer I am down here (Earth, people .... c'mon, keep up!) without him, having to deal with the crapola (to put it nicely; incredibly, Shirley Temple-ish nicely) with which he, as a very smart man.... and father of 6 .... 3 girls, THREE BOYS (but really, who's counting?) .... left me to deal with ....
the more incredibly p***** off I am going to be when I finally get there.

I imagine he's trying to do a lot of bargaining with God ..... to, you know, either get me up there sooner, rather than later ..... or to make sure his mansion has round-the-clock armed guards.
Oh for goodness sake ..... YES I realize that there's no such thing in Heaven!!  EVERYONE knows that God doesn't keep time, so "round-the-clock" really wouldn't apply.
Sheesh.  I'm not a moron.

What?
Everyone also knows that Texas is like Heaven so don't even think I'm wrong on the armed-guard thing.
Whatever.

I really wish you Peeps would stop interrupting me .... it's getting very annoying.
Not to mention difficult to remember where I was in this post composition.
I'm sleep-deprived, remember?!
Stop judging!!!

Let's see ...... oh, yeah .... me,  p***** off.
Him,  hiding out.

Because here's what he's picturing will happen on JH Day.
WHAT NOW???
Seriously?
Janine's in Heaven Day.
(I can't believe there are so many remedial Peeps.)
Sigh .....

Me:  (arriving in Heaven and bursting through those pearly whites gates) .... "Hi, hello, hi there, oh yes, hi, Grandma .... I'll be right back, I promise .... by the way, have you seen Jim?  Not lately?  OK, thanks.

Oh, hi .... yes, it's nice to see you, too (wondering what her name is, dang-it ..... wait, can I say dang-it in Heaven?  Crap, I just said it twice!) .... OK, people, it's nice to see all of you and thank you SO much for the enthusiastic welcome, but I just need to push past all of you for just a bit.  Sorry, oh .... didn't mean to elbow you there.  Truly.  I'm just on a .... you know .... mission.

What?  Who?  Where?!  Oh ..... oh, ummmm, hi there, Jesus.  Can you please wait a sec?  I'll be right with you. By the way, have you seen Jim?  Really?!  Armed-guards?  I KNEW IT!!"

Jim: not saying anything .... just quaking in his boots sandals.  And praying that those armed guards realize that I'm most likely packin'.

What?  It could happen!

Happy Friday, Peeps.

:)

Covenants

Thank you, Susan. No one has mentioned the word "covenant". I did a Beth Moore study on that several years ago and really learned a lot. You're right ..... it was, and is, a covenant. But then, does it ever end? It doesn't end at death? What if I were to fall in love and want to marry someone? Totally hypothetical here ..... because believe me ..... now that I have TWO closets, there is NO STINKING WAY I'll ever be able to give one up.

And before some of my readers think how horrible that might sound, Jim is standing behind me, reading this and laughing is butt off. Well, not really .... I guess you have to have a butt to laugh it off, but I digress.

I'm am totally enjoying time with my grandma .... well, the time that I'm here. I had a luncheon yesterday and had to work today, but we went to dinner and then to C's football game tonight.

And speaking of his football game ..... I am going to vent.

Prepare yourselves. Especially if you coach middle school football.

HOLD MY HOOPS!!!!! I am going to slap that man silly!!

Son #3 and I left for Oklahoma last Friday around 1:00 (OK, it was supposed to be 1:00 but since the flight was delayed it was more like 3:00) so I had to take him out of school early. Which means that he missed football practice after school that day. Which means, and here's where you have to hold me back ....... the coach penalized him and told him that he would not be starting in today's game because he missed that practice. Well, not only did he not start, but he played less than 5 minutes during the entire game. He was very upset, which made me very upset. Besides, my 86 year old grandmother came to that game to watch him play!!! And Mom and D came to the game!! I am so P***** at that man!!! Why do they punish the children for something they have NO control over???? That was so unfair and childish. Are ALL football coaches like this???? Do they all have a power trip going on? If you are one, and you do not, then please comment and tell me so. Because all I want to do is go up to that middle school and rip into that man.

OK, I vented. I feel better.

Not really, but I'll pretend to.

 This is my sweet grandma:

This is my mom and my grandma:
This is Son #3, waiting to play (#26).  Who knew that he'd be waiting for 3 quarters?
Here he is, sucking on his mouth guard and looking at me, while I'm yelling his name!
Here he is on the field .... notice that it is now dark.  Oh, and you can't tell which one is him, but trust me, he's out there.

     OK, that's all for tonight.  I need to drink a glass of wine and relax.  I know that if I say or write anything to that coach, Son #3 will never play football again while he goes to school here.

And if you are a football coach (or a band director, or choir director, or theatre teacher or any sports coach) and this is how you operate ..... you should be totally ashamed of yourself.

Reader-moms ---- any opinions?

Weekend Pics

I am now back to the world of blogdom.  Thanks for the comments and for the answers to my question.  You all did a great job!

I am still at the lake and have no intention of going back until we have power.

"They" said that it would be back today.  Whatevah.

Now I'm hearing that it could be some time next week.

Don't get me started.

Anyway, I'm glad the weekend is over.  I have no idea when Son #2 will get a chance to see my blog again (and thus the comments).  He's on a pretty tight restriction because of his grades.  I'm SO glad it's them and not me!  

And I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that he is exactly where he needs to be, no matter what he's told his friends, who now all feel incredibly sorry for him.

Funny, he was totally in control of where he ended up.  It was his decision.

So here are some pics from the weekend.  He was happier in some than others.

Obviously.

       Here he is Friday night at the game .... once he calmed down and stopped yelling at me.  I could not believe how much he's changed, physically.  He's taller and has put on muscle.  He looked so much older to me!

     Here he is, getting along with me!

     Saturday morning, marching in the graduation parade:

     Getting his graduation certificate, from his second most favorite person on earth, next to me .... his Drill Instructor (DI).  The man is very OK with being hated.  I like him very much.

         Oh .... my .... gosh!!!!   This is one of the few hours that he liked me:
     

     The crew, minus Daughter #1:

     Posing for pictures .... and, I might add, a wee bit proud of himself.  I hope that pride gets more and more common:

   

     And this is pretty much how he looked when I left him ... only much worse.

There ya go ....  a little recap of the weekend.

Aren't you jealous that you weren't there?

P.S.  On the subject of power, or lack thereof,  I've thought of 2 more things I HUGELY miss.

Well, technically it's 3 things, but two usually count as one:  a washer/dryer and ......

I know this is really pathetic, but .... it's my vacuum cleaner.  If you've never been without power for days on end ..... you - have - no - idea.

I have a new definition of "skank" --- and it is my carpet.

Speechless

This is Jim with Son #2 when he was 2. All of our kids could swim before they were one. We lived in the pool. I'm just glad I could find a picture where the kids had on their swim suits! The boys absolutely loved swimming (and everything else) naked. I think they've finally outgrown that. Whew.

Well, the poll has left me without words. Literally. I am amazed at the number of you! And I am grateful. More than I can say. It feels wonderful to have so many people caring and praying for us .... still. And it feels wonderful to know that many of you don't even know us and you are caring and praying.

Thank you .... so, so much.

Today was better. I finally got out on the courts and played tennis. My shoulder did fairly well. We drilled with a pro, who kept telling me when to relax and rest it. Then we started to play a match. That was fine --- until it was my turn to serve. I did manage to serve a game (and win it!) but it pushed my shoulder over the edge. It became aggravated again! But not as bad as it was before. I took something for the pain as soon as it started and that helped a lot. We then stopped playing and went out for lunch and a bit of shopping. Who wouldn't have a better day?! Oh, and Mr. Fix It stopped by to look at the printer -- he fixed it!!!! Thanks for the prayers!

The boys are all out tonight -- babysitting, Bible study and Confirmation. Daughter #1 is at work. So the kittens and I are just relaxing and enjoying "Supernanny". OK, the kittens are passed out next to me so I'm the only one enjoying it. And really, "enjoying" isn't the right word. I'm always shocked at the kids and parents on this show. They want to be on national TV with this behavior? Really?!! Do they get paid? And let me just say --- I would love that job! I'd love to go to parents' homes and help them with their kids. Not that I have all of the answers, not at all --- obviously, but I think that "no-nonsense, appropriate consequences and no crap-tolerating" parenting is not practiced as much as it used to be. I'm not sure why, but it's not. Too many people want their kids to like them. What's up with that?! Sheesh!!

Parenting and parents ---- don't get me started!!

That's something that has become more difficult without Jim. We almost always agreed on discipline and parenting -- 99% of the time. We balanced each other --- we kept each other sane. I hate doing this, as well as everything else in my life, alone. Especially the really, really hard stuff. I have to admit --- once or twice I've found myself angry at him. Angry that he has left me all alone to deal with this crap. And trust me, "crap" is a nicer word than what it actually is sometimes. I know, intellectually, that it wasn't his fault. He never, ever would've chosen this for us. Never. But sometimes my heart, soul, mind and body just grow weary. And intellect goes by the wayside.

OK, enough of that. I'm going to stop now so that I can see how Jo takes the "paci" away from the disrespectful, tantrum-throwing, non-disciplined, not sleeping-on-her-own 4 year old.

Don't. Get. Me. Started!

Should I be happy?

Interesting quesiton, MB. Should I/we be happy that Jim is in heaven? Well, of course if I were a "good" Christian then I'd have to give you the pat, "good" answer: 'Of course I'm glad that he's up there, with God, praising and singing (though he never really enjoyed singing so I'm not sure he's all THAT thrilled) and will never suffer again.'
But I think we Christians tend to gave way too many "pat" answers, mostly because we don't know what to say, or because we don't know what the heck (refrained there) we're talking about. So here's my real answer (because I don't feel very "good" nor "pat" at the moment):
No, I'm not happy that he's in heaven. I'm beyond furious! I think this was a stupid idea and I wish I could understand what HE was thinking when He tore such a good, decent and godly man out of our lives. He hadn't been sick; he wasn't suffering (until the morning he woke up); and I was told there was an 80 - 90% success rate for this surgery! Jim could've and should've done so much more in our community, in our church and in our family. I was making headway in getting him to go to Africa so he would've had an even bigger impact on our world.
I'm not happy that my children have lost their father.  My sons, especially the youngest two, need him now more than they've ever needed him.  And now they just have me.  A grieving me.  I wish they had him .... and not me.  I wish with all of my heart that it had been me .... and not Jim.  They need him so very much.

Yes, I know there's the whole "My thoughts are not your thoughts & My ways are not your ways" verse, but for the first time in my life, verses seem to ring a little shallow.
It's not that I'm turning from my faith -- heck I've had that longer than I had Jim, but it just seems far away right now. God seems very far away. He felt like He was a million miles away on the 18th when so many people were in battle, praying for Jim to live. To use one of Rick's illustrations from the Cantata: I feel like one tiny frozen pea, lost in the Astrodome of God's galaxy. And I don't or can't trust that He'll ever put me back in His arms again.
Yet.