I Am Alive .......

...... and I can't tell you how wonderful it is to type those words. Its Tuesday morning and I'm at the clinic. Yesterday I wasnt able to get out of bed for longer than an hour, and that's when I basically and almost literally, crawled downstairs to meet my team for dinner.
Before those of you who are thinking "I told you so." ... stop thinking it. This is not the same as last time. Sometime on Satuday I started developing a sinus infection. Which then turned into a massive sinus infection. Thankfully it's only on my left side. Un thankfully it slammed into my body so hard it seemed to infuriate my RA. I slept very little Sat night and felt exhausted Sun am, but didn't know yet what was going on. The exhaustion grew worse as the day wore on. We attended church where we were going to set up the clinic. I think I last 30 mins or so before I went outside, thinking the fresh air and small children out there would energize me. Not so much.
My left nostril started to drip .... constantly, embarassingly and frustratingly. There was no warning, no feeling of having a runny nose, it was just suddenly leaking. And it looked rust-colored. I knew I was in trouble. At that point I went to our van and laid down. The next thing I knew it was an hour later and the team was back, ready to go to the hotel. And I felt like crap.
We went to our hotel (which compared to my last visit is a Marriott!) and I think I hit the bed. At one point we were going to visit a boy's home, like an orphanage but some had a parent). I had the choice to sleep or go and I really wanted to go, so I did. And spent some time asleep on my feet. Literally. It can be done. Not for long, without embarassing consequences, I suppose, but still. I slept on the way, I slept there, I slept on the way to a grocery store. Then back to the hotel for dinner, which I ate a little of, and then went to bed before everyone else was done.
I decided to take an antibiotic my dr had prescribed, "just in case" I picked up something. Thank You, God.
And then I spent a very long night with fever and a lot of pain all over my body. Death would've felt merciful.
At 5:15 I got up, took Day 2's antibiotic, finally took something for pain, and laid back down to rest before leaving at 7:15. At 7 I woke up, realizing: 1. Those were the 1 1/2 best hours of sleep I'd had in several days, and 2. I was not able to get out of bed. So I texted, and cried (which was to become the theme of my day) and told Al I couldn't come.
He came up and prayed with and for me and then they left. I hit the bed, woke up at 3, decided to see if a shower would help, it did not, took a pain med and fell back asleep until 6:15 when Al knocked and knocked and then called out my name, which sort of woke me from a dead sleep. We talked for a bit and I felt better than I had all day, though still felt exhausted. I said I'd meet for dinner at 7 and spent the next 40 minutes trying very hard to not fall asleep. I made it and ate a little for dinner. The left side of my face felt horrific and I have no idea how it managed to not look the same way, but the rest of me had improved. I lasted the entire time, then we all went to bed at 8:30.
I had another bad night but slept more than I thought I would. My alarm went off at 6:30. I got up and started to get ready for a shower, but it was not to be. I still seemed to have fever and still felt like crap. Which made me crawl back in bed ...... and cry. I did NOT come all this way to stay in bed, wishing for a quick and less-pain-than-I-was-experiencing death.
After 15 mins I forced myself to get up, give myself the RA injection I couldn't manage yesterday, swallow a pain med and antibiotic and then shower. Ugh. I then got dressed and headed down to breakfast, where, as soon as they asked is I was better, I started to cry. Because I was not. But I forced
myself to eat a little and decided to go to the clinic, knowing I could return to the hotel at any time.
I'm glad I did.
I'm still a little shaky and the left side of my face hurts, but its good to be around people and I'm feeling a slight improvement as the morning goes on. The people are just as I remember them, quiet (except for those who live near our hotel and party 24/7), warm, happy and beautiful.
I'm glad I came, in spite of the previous couple of days. If you'd asked me that yesterday I couldn't have said I was glad. I would've  asked why Kenya wants to kill me.
But I'm feeling "bettah".
And I'm not dead yet!

Jumaine njema, Peeps!
(Happy Tuesday!)
:)
P.S. please ignore spelling and editing. It's a phone, not a computer.


UPDATE: Its's now 5/00 pm and I'm feeling much better. At 2:00 my body hit the proverbial wall, so I rested in the van for an hour. We are now getting ready to shut down for the day. Thanks for praying, Peeps. Please keep doing so. I need to get a good night's rest and feel 100% tomorrow. Or at least 65%. I made it to 50 today and am NOT complaining!